


Too Little, Too Late

by Wix



Category: Captain America (Movies), Doctor Strange (Comics), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers return, Break Up, Civil War Team Iron Man, M/M, Moving On, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Steve Rogers-centric, Team Dynamics, not a fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 09:04:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13454982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wix/pseuds/Wix
Summary: At the Avengers return party, Steve has to come to terms with the very real fallout of his actions.





	Too Little, Too Late

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a short that I typed up. Hope you enjoy it!

It’s the first time that Steve’s been in the same area as Tony in over a year, and his eyes desperately take in everything and burn it to memory. The sight of Tony was something that he’d taken for granted, and it was only in the aftermath of the ‘Civil War’ that Steve even realized that he had.

From a general sort of glance, Tony looked resplendent. His clothes were perfectly tailored, his personal grooming on par, and he looked like he’d managed to catch up on all the sleep that he’d been missing out on these last few years. Steve tries to ignore the way that Tony’s lips slide into a perfect smile when he sees them, a smile that held no real emotion or feeling behind it, it would just look good in the pictures printed tomorrow and put up on all of those webpages that hounded them all daily. He tries to ignore the way that Tony keeps Rhodes and his new team between them subtly throughout the entire press event, only managing to slide up to one of them whenever a camera was raised and poised to take a picture before walking off with a smile like there was something terribly pressing calling for his immediate attention. He was like a ninja, there one moment and gone the next before any of them could truly reach out and attempt a conversation.

It was all fake, as they had expected it to be on the plane ride over, but it still felt like a deep wound that hadn’t had a chance to close yet was getting salt rubbed into it. Steve watched from the sidelines as Tony schmoozed and charmed everyone at the event, breezing through conversations like a second nature and leaving everyone feeling like they’d been visited by something special and that for that one moment they’d been special enough to have his attention on them.

“You should go talk to him.” Natasha whispers as she comes over to where he’s standing by the bar, cradling a long since watered down drink in his hands as he watches the brunet make his rounds before returning to Doctor Strange’s side with an honest smile on his face.

“Now’s really not the time.” Steve says softly, trying to ignore the pang of hurt as Strange’s arm rests easily against the small of Tony’s back as they chat animatedly with some small group of intellectuals. She sighs to his side, ordering herself a drink before turning and glancing in the direction that Steve is.

“Sooner or later the clock is going to strike midnight and all of this ‘goodwill’ is going to go away faster than a blown out candle.” She warns him and he gives her a tired look.

“You think I don’t know that?” He asks and she shakes her head, holding up her hands in surrender as she backs off. “I don’t…I wouldn’t know what to say to him.”

“Just starting a conversation might be a good way to start.”

“He’s with Strange now.” Steve says. “And I don’t want us to just…start fighting.” Natasha doesn’t say anything at first as she takes her drink and takes a small sip.

“I think that’s unavoidable for the first few weeks.” She says. “And let’s be honest Steve, Tony’s loved you for years. Whatever fling he has going on with Strange doesn’t even hold a candle to what you two have.”

“Had.” Steve reminds her.

“Captain Rogers.” A senator greets with a smile that’s too wide and too excited. It’s the kind of smile that Tony used to warn him about in amused hushed whispers – the smile of a ‘true diehard fan’ who would undoubtedly cling onto him for _hours_ if given the chance. “It’s such a pleasure to meet you.” He says and Steve gives him his own media smile, the one that he perfected selling bonds to the masses and the one that used to make Tony laugh with how plastic and picture perfect it was.

He’d once said that he thought it could give him a run for his money, but Steve had always disagreed. Tony did it better, Tony always did everything better and Tony always got the sweetest smile like Steve was an adorable fool whenever Steve found the time to tell him that.

“Hello.” Steve greets and he ignores the pang of remembrance of how these nights used to go. Tony always had his back, whispering the names of people left and right so that Steve never felt like he was out of his depth…but the whisper doesn’t come this time because Tony isn’t even looking in their direction.

That hurts too.

The lack of coy and amused glances from across the room, of dark eyes glancing at him from over champagne flutes that promised so much fun later if Steve just managed to survive the room-

“-prised to hear.” The man is saying and Steve forces his attention back to the moment at hand. He’s spared the horrifying moment of responding to whatever the man has said when Nat pipes in.

“Yes, we were surprised as well.” She says with a smile that the other man stumbles over himself for. “We didn’t expect for Ross’s crimes to come to light and help bring us home.” She gives him a brief glance like she knows his head wasn’t in the game and Steve’s secretly so grateful for it. He stays around as the senator tries to keep Natasha’s attention for a while before he smiles at the both of them in farewell.

“Please excuse me…” He says softly as he ducks out and he can see the moment that the senator realizes that he’s missed his chance with his ‘idol’ and Steve’s practically halfway across the room before he takes a deep breath in relief and puts the glass down with a thanks to the person clearing it away. He wars with himself for a few moments after that before he squares back his shoulders and makes his move. He wonders if he has any right to do this, but although the answer is no, he can’t help but try. He interjects himself into the small circle that Tony’s present in and he gives everyone else a sheepish smile. Strange gives him a look like he’s not even threatened by Steve’s presence and that kind of irks Steve on some level. “I’m so sorry, do you mind if I steal him away for a quick moment?” Steve says and he holds out his hand for Tony to take. There’s a tightness in Tony’s eyes, an anger that Steve knows is justified, but Tony smiles regardless and takes the offered hand before letting Steve pull him out onto the dance floor. “Thank you.” He says softly and Tony’s whole body is tense as he moves himself into a familiar position.

“It’s just one dance Rogers.” He says, his voice cold and quiet so as not to draw attention to them.

“I know…I know.” He whispers back as he starts the required steps, leading the brunet along with him like nothing is wrong between them. “I’m sorry.” He says and Tony’s grip on his hand tightens.

“Now is _not_ the time for that.” Tony responds.

“I just…I guess I just wanted a moment to talk to you. In private.” Steve says, before trying to give Tony a smile. “You always did say the dance floor was the best place to hold a private conversation.”

“What do you want?” Tony says and it makes Steve’s smile fall off his face, but no one else would have noticed if they’d been watching.

“Why did you do it?” He asks after a moment. “Why bring us back?”

“I didn’t.” Tony admits. “I actively protested against it.”

“I’m sorry Tony.” Steve feels driven to say and Tony does some complicated move that would have made Steve’s mouth dry out in the old days. It still does, but now Steve’s got the added guilt of even daring to have a thought like that about the man in his arms.

“’Sorry’ doesn’t fix anything.” Tony says. “Even with your sorry you’re still a hypocritical, lying piece of shit.”

“Tony…” What is he supposed to say to that? Tony’s right, after all and he figures he may as well tell him that. “You’re right…I am all that, all that and more probably.” He pushes in closer. “I’m a coward for not telling you the _second_ I found out. I’m irredeemable for trying to cover it up once it came out and I don’t know how to repair anything I’ve broken.” Tony’s smile falls as he looks up at him and he doesn’t look pleased with Steve.

“What’s your end goal here?” He asks, and there’s rage in his voice. “Butter me up? Say a few self-flagellating things and hope that the wool gets pulled back over my eyes? Did you practice it in the mirror and then think I’d just get on my knees for you posthaste?”

“No.” Steve says. “I just…I wanted to be honest with you.” Tony’s grip gets tight again and Steve doesn’t doubt that if he didn’t have the serum that the grip would be borderline crushing.

“A little late to jump on that bandwagon.” Tony snaps.

“I really hope that isn’t true.” Steve says softly and Tony’s face neutrality falls for a second as he almost sneers at Steve, but catches himself at the last second and manages to hold it in till the dance is over.

“Go to hell Rogers.” Is his final farewell as he leaves him standing there on the dance floor, and Steve feels like he might already be there as he watches Tony walk away and back to Strange’s side.

“I take it didn’t go so well?” Sam says to him once he finds himself back at the bar and Steve sighs as he orders another drink that’s going to do absolutely nothing for him no matter how much he might wish it would.

+++

It’s strange to be back at the Compound and to be back in his old room. He hasn’t slept in here for years and it shows. There’s nothing personal on the walls or on the shelves. Most of his stuff seems to be in boxes on the bed, but some of his clothes have been tossed onto the floor as though Tony had thrown them inside the door in a rage before heading back to his room and grabbing the next few shirts and repeating the process. Some are even still connected to the hangars they once rested on.

There’s a layer of dust that’s clinging to everything that tells Steve no one has been in this room since Tony returned all his stuff to it. The room is a visual representation of that open wound he was thinking about earlier and Steve closes the door lightly behind him as he takes it in.

This is Tony’s rage, Tony’s pain and Tony’s goodbye all wrapped up into one horrible package.

Steve doesn’t really stop to think about it, moving around the room and picking up everything and putting it in its old place. It takes him a few hours to unpack the boxes and clean up the mess and when he’s finally finished he looks around the room – and he feels his legs give out underneath him and he just slides down to the floor, puts his head in his hands and cries.

It wasn’t worth it.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you thought!  
> But please no comments of a critiquing or negative nature.


End file.
